Wednesday, April 27, 2011

2- The Gym

Original Arabic Post: Here

For so many personal, behavioral, and religious reasons, I don’t prefer to go the gym in the mixed – as in men and women – days. So, I go when it is for women only which could be considered a suicidal action for me since I hear so many things that really press on my nerves, such as:

“The nice belly is the one that it below waist, men just love it!”
“Nothing but an enlarged stomach, men just hate that!”
“Do you know Yousra’s side-thighs? My daughter has them, but my daughter isn’t as tall as Yousra. But that’s OK, no man likes his wife to be taller than him!”
“I won’t work on my thighs. Don’t like thin legs. Men don’t like it when the pants are not full with the woman’s thighs. They even mock thin legs so hard!”
“Well it all depends, there are different tastes. Some men actually like the thin woman, a friend of mine is really very thin, and her husband is fine with that and not complaining!”
“May be, but a thin woman looks really bad in night gowns, a woman has to have something here and there!”
“God bless the cup!”
“Oh my fiancée doesn’t eat fish at all!!” “No, it’s your mistake, you have to present it to him in a nice attractive way” – as if it is the end of the world if her fiancée is not eating fish!! – “If only you were me, my fiancée doesn’t eat at all!!”



Now before any misunderstanding, I’m not by any means against the fact that people, women or men, care for their looks. I myself go to the gym for that exact purpose. Nor am I against also feeling flattered when you hear nice complements of any kind. I was so happy by your positive feedback in the comments.

What pisses me off, is when a woman lives all her life waiting to be accredited as a woman from the man! She is not a beautiful woman unless he calls her that, she is not smart except when he describes her with the word, and she won’t be successful before the day he points that out!

And since we all know that a typical man won’t allow a woman to be smarter or more efficient than him, so by default, there’s an umbrella of ambitions above which a woman is not allowed to even think of passing!

Which leads to the major problem that usually makes me suffocate which is this chronic “Underestimation” disease that most of our ladies here suffer from. A very clear example to that, is when I was back in medical school, and it was quite frequent to hear one of my female colleagues saying “If I ever get sick, I’ll never go to a female doctor!!” “Men are you know, smarter, and they are real doctors!” Of course here she was shouting out loud her “declaration of dependence” to the world of men, assuring all of them that it was a known fact that she is clueless, and helpless with them!

To that extent and even more, an Egyptian woman is brought in an environment that deprives her self-esteem, sense of security and confidence. She no longer can feel her existence in absence of a man in her life. Without a man, she is just not complete. And if being accepted by men means saying, feeling and living her lack of her own special gifts, then it is of course fine!!